Raven

Raven sat on the floor of her room, completely dark but for a single candle. "Azar, I beseech you," she prayed. "Hear my words, answer my prayers. I need you, Goddess. I need you. My mind is a battleground, whipped and ripped asunder, torn from the very fabric of reality. He, that demon who is Trigon, that demon who is my father...he calls for me. And his summons becomes so hard to resist."

She heard nothing from her former teacher, no words or comforting touch on her mind, but she hadn't really expected she would. Still, it hurt to have that last bit of hope crumble. "Then my course is charted," she murmured. "And my sad destiny awaits."

She'd leave in the morning. She'd run like she'd run from Azarath, a last attempt to protect those she loved before the evil churning within her consumed her. But for one last night she'd pretend Fandom was still her home.

Raven blew out the candle, crawled into her bed, and cried herself to sleep.

( Raven wasn't the only person still awake. )

[And away we go. Preplayed with glacial_witch. NFI and NFB, but OOC, as always, is welcome.]

Without classes Monday, Raven kept to her room to study and meditate because that's how she rolled. But where she usually found peace and tranquility was instead a nightmare of horrific images of Fandom and the mainland shattered and destroyed, the people twisted and frozen in stone, silently screaming in agony. And those dearest to her lay dead at her feet, or worse yet, kneeling in servitude to her, their eyes red and empty of any hint of a soul.

And over it all, the sound of her father's laughter.

She snapped out of her trance, shaking with fear, then got up and stumbled over to her dresser to stare at her face in the mirror. She felt a surge of relief that she only had two blue eyes and that there weren't four red ones looking back at her. She had dark circles under those eyes from a lack of restful sleep lately, but that could be easily hidden with makeup. Because she was fine. Really. Things were going well, and she'd just had a bad dream. And the lingering soreness in her right side from healing Jacob and the pain in her neck from healing Sookie was just her imagination, leftover stress from Kaeleer. It would soon pass.

Because she was fine. Really.


[ooc: door is cracked, post is open. If you're sensitive to such things, it's OK to pick up on unpleasant vibes coming from the room before Raven locked it down, la. And yes, she's being an idiot. *sighs*]

Since their return from Kaeleer, Raven had retreated to her room. She'd spent over 24 hours in meditation, trying to restore her shattered shields and banish the negative emotions that still churned within her. She'd gotten most of it under control, but she still felt some of Jaenelle's lust and Karla's despair and the anger from the confrontation with Saetan, Lucivar, and Morton. It had never been so difficult for her to purge herself of emotions she'd absorbed, and she blamed weakening herself in Agio and how Jaenelle had almost destroyed her along with the Jhinka. All those deaths, all that pain had torn through her shields and left her raw and exposed to her father's power. It'd come so close to taking control of her, closer than anyone, maybe even Jono, who'd been right next to her, could know.

Twenty-four hours of meditation later, she was tired and hungry but not feeling much more settled.


[Door is closed, but post is open for calls or knocks.]

After Magic Reserves, Raven retreated to her room to meditate. She thought she had buried the part of her that longed so much for love, but apparently not deep enough, and she was projecting her desires again. It at least had made sense when she had affected Jono, and even somewhat so for projecting on her fellow students, but Max? First of all, he was a teacher. Secondly, she still panicked a little around him because of what his vampire self had done to her. She would never want to encourage his affections, but he'd professed his love in the park. Katchoo made more sense than Max, and she made no sense at all.

Raven sat cross-legged on her bed, calling on her Azarathian training to purge herself of the wayward desire, and on the training Anakin had given her to shield herself and stop projecting. She had no idea neither were necessary.

[ooc: for a special delivery or two. Door is closed but not locked; post is open.]

It was a pleasant enough day, and Raven found it hard to meditate in the cabins due to the noise and close quarters, so she took Professor Skywalker's advice and decided to explore the Preserve. She found a peaceful clearing and settled in the middle of it, breathing in the scent of the woods and the incense she lit. Closing her eyes, she let herself drift into a trance. The shadow raven form of her Soul-Self rose from her body and into the air, soaring about the trees.

[ooc: open if you happen to be wandering the area (or you could spot the giant raven form in the sky and follow it back toward her)]